Author: Noel Murphy

Hello, my little furry friends.

Stay furry. Don’t shave those pits. Pits are meant to be furry. How are you all?

Well, what a week I’ve had. Between the storm and the visions of the Lord Jesus; I’ve been up to me eyes, not to mention the being from the other dimension that got stuck in my hair.

It’s either a feast or a famine.

Anyway this week, the editor took me off my medication and asked to write about politics. Yea. I got bored too. So I’m going to try to make this as entertaining as possible. As always enjoy, and If you don’t……I’m sure Joe Duffy will listen because Noely bloody won’t. This week I’m delving into the world of politics, and the importance and traditions of spoiling your vote.

Now we all know and are told of the importance of voting. “Many a good man and woman died for your right to vote” and of course both sides in the 8th Amendment will be targeting young voters in particular to push their liberal and conservative agendas.

We all know that episode of South Park with “Turd Sandwich” and “Giant Douche” and the impossible choice that Kyle had to make between two useless bastards. Well, we don’t have to decide between the useless bastards we can choose to not vote or spoil.


So what is spoiling a vote? Well, the technical terms which I just copied and pasted from some random website with an advert for penile erection medication taking up half the page are:

  • Failing to mark the ballot at all (blank vote), or otherwise defacing the ballot instead of attempting to vote.
  • Filling out the ballot in a manner that is incompatible with the voting system being used, e.g.:
    • Marking more choices than permitted (overvoting), or fewer than necessary (undervoting).
    • Filling a preference ballot out of sequence, e.g. 1-2-2-3-4 or 1-2-4-5-6. In most cases, only the first two choices in these examples would be counted as valid.
    • Adding a write-in candidate when such an option is not permitted. The vote for this candidate would be discarded.
  • Filling the ballot in a manner that makes the voter’s decision unclear.
  • Physically deforming ballots, especially those counted by machine.
  • Making marks on the ballot other than those necessary to complete it, where the voter’s identity can be ascertained, compromising the secrecy of the ballot.

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Mostly it’s unintentional but some do it as a protest kind of like writing “Fuck the System” on your ballot. And whats so wrong with that? Why is it so wrong that at a time when the system needs a kick in the arse it gets one from us, the voters?

But don’t be fooled into thinking your spoiled vote doesn’t matter. It does. Because it’s not null and void. It does have consequences, its regarded as a non-vote which can impact very close elections or referendums. It normally serves the status quo, i.e. those who are in government or to take the Abortion referendum those to want to keep the 8th. This is because your vote was not counted. But that’s not always true, in the event of the last British election it had a very negative effect on the Conservatives. Also, bear in mind spoiling your vote can lead to certain legal implications. It is illegal to deface public owned property, i.e. a ballot sheet.


So why can’t you give the two fingers to society? Why can’t you just not turn up? Because it is programmed into us. We have to vote. PEOPLE DIED FOR OUR RIGHT TO VOTE.

Yes. but they also died for our rights and freedoms NOT TO VOTE. Surely that is the whole point of a democracy, is it not?

Again taking the 8th amendment referendum. A lot of my friends especially the male ones don’t feel comfortable in voicing an opinion on this one. Should they be MADE vote even if they are experiencing crises of conscience because society says its “the right thing to do”?

Screw that. That does not a democracy make!!! So VIVE LE REVOLUTION and do what you feel is best to do.

york-dogs-polling-stations-2017-main-1170x792 (1)


  1. Other (modern) ways of spoiling your vote?
    Don’t take a selfie in the polling station!
    Coming up to the referendum on the 8th amendment – don’t walk into the polling station wearing badges, t-shirts etc with Repeal the 8th or Save the 8th logos on them

    Students DO check the register now, to see if you are registered to vote! Especially for those voting for the first time or those who have changed address recently.

    Do get out and vote, whatever way you vote, it is important!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. It is important I agree. However its just as important in my view to tell society to go take a jump. One of the best ways throughout democracy has been spoiling your vote. Its a democracy. Its our right.


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